I’m not sure I can express the unorthodoxy that exists in my support of Valve this past week. Frankly, I’m not used to being for something, because most people generally behave moronically (and oxymoronically, for that matter). For some reason, however, Valve has surpassed, once againm the din of humanity’s incompetence and especially that of the Steam Forums.

The rift drawn between players in the Team Fortress 2 community has tickled me pink. I love the hatred being expressed, the frustration, the anger and the lack of vindication being experienced (or the lack of vindication that they think they’re experiencing) amongst the TF2 community.  And for technical regards, I am greatly satiated by the fact that Valve has, at last, acknowledged that the Soldier is a class that requires little to no skill to play fairly successfully. That’s not to say that everyone playing the Soldier has no skill, it’s simply to say that in order to fare decently in TF2, one could simply play Soldier, regardless of past experience.

What does this recognition mean? Not only was the Demoman outnumbered, but also outgunned; simply put: the Soldier is more powerful, in general. In even plainer speech: the Soldier is “easymode” compared to the Demoman. Valve has squelched all purpose to vomitous forum debates, hate speech and regurgitations regarding the Soldier vs. Demoman issue. The fact of the matter is that the Demoman is a class that requires more grace, more care and, overall, more skill to succeed with.

I could list off reasons why the Demoman is a far more respectable and more challenging class to play, and therefore more deserving of an unlock, but I don’t need to. Valve, the creator of the game, has acknowledged and declared that the Soldier is the “World’s easiest class.”

And of course, one will try to argue that Valve’s newspaper is sarcasm. Of course it is. But a few ounces of foresight and stylistic analysis will reveal that Valve is conveying the fact that, their creation, the Soldier, is a class that requires relatively no skill to succeed with. The entire purpose of Valve’s newspaper is to relay information in a comical, yet informative manner. This one is no exception. The bottom line: the Demoman requires more prowess to do well with than the Soldier does.

In other words: suck it, Soldiers.